The implications of being unwell are not just singular issues but the illness or maladies  have a reverberating affect on the whole of your families. Take today for example, we as a family like to get our Christmas shopping done and dusted by the end of November. So today we decided that we would take Marcus up to the “save-a-center” and allow him to choose his own presents. Nothing unusual about that you might think. Well what was unusual was that I could only manage about 30 mins on my feet and was then subjected to the ignominy of having to use the wheel chair. People do really only see the chair I don’t know if you have ever read the book “does he take sugar” if you haven’t than you should, because as in the book the disabled felt outside of society, so did I today. I couldn’t get into some shops due to the fact they put far to many clothes hanging stands together and you have to ask someone to get an item for you. This made what should have been a relaxing time with the family an undesirable event. Not one shop in the center could be called disabled friendly all in some way fell down with regards to the “DDA”. the problem I have is that I don’t want to be the one to complain as at the time the rest of the family were having a good time. So I sat outside most of the shops watching the world go by. Even when it cane to having supper at the eating area the counters were to high for me to see over and the information I needed was out of my line of sight, so I let Sue choose for me rather than making a fuss. STUPID or what !!!!!!!!!someone should make a stand and force the legislation through. Not only that in the event of a fire all of those shops that have the clothing racks to close together would be responsible for the loss of life in the panic that would surely ensue.

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James Blunt: 'You’re Beautiful'


MSN Music in Concert presents James Blunt live from London performing "You’re Beautiful"

I am beginning to like this machine. I woke this morning after a really bad night, lots of pain, nightmares, cold sweats, and very bloody sore feet by all standards not a good night at all in fact on the scale of one to ten, ten being the worst last night was an eleven and a half. Yet today I have been able to talk to all sorts of email and messenger friends from China Russia America Finland Germany Canada and last but by no means least good old France. Most of you are my Internet friends you seem to know me and what is most humbling you know when I’m not well. For all of you who have sent me massages today from the Christian Net and other rooms thank you. At least I wont be going to bed as bad as what I awoke today God Bless and Love to You All.
Time for something to eat
LOVE YA

I had to go to the hospital yesterday, I thought it might be good news as they rang in the morning to bring my appointment forward by 2 hours, boy nothing could have been further from the truth. I got to speak to a very nice surgeon a lady and for the life of me I don't remember her name. any way the reason I had to see her was for the results of tests, angioplasty, and some exercising moves that I have been doing for the last year, boy do they hurt.

Any way let me tell you the good news and the bad, the good news is I am still alive, the bad is that there is nothing they can do. I sat in there thinking oh my god what do I do now. she was very sympathetic and I believe what you would call empathic to my situation. the damage is part of the DVT that I have and at last there is no guessing. the first and most important fact she told me was that I still have clots in my right calf and thigh with damaged veins in the calf. I asked and she responded. I left feeling very deflated and my Sue was crying as well. I managed to pull myself up and out of the despair but its left me with some serious thinking and soul searching bout the future. one point she made perfectly clear if I get another "break away" my number would be up.

Not to happy at the moment I am feeling very low and a sorry outlook and personality. live sucks, I will get back to you tomorrow. Don't life just suck I get a few good days from time to time and then it all comes rushing back just as I get to relax. for the first time in a long time I don't have a single prayer or reading I can go to to stop the rot.

Norman